In Search of the Light in Me

Thinker.

Lost in the clouds.

Grounded in the truth.

Yet, what is my truth?

In search and hurry for the me

I’m meant to be,

but patience is what I keep

going back to to be the best me.

Second guess everything!

But it’s all love.

Love is everything.

Love. Is. Everything.

One day,

the moments will be present.

Constant battle with

the past, present, and future.

Never understand who

wins until later.

But that’s the beauty of life

and hindsight…

I do not need to understand everything.

Yes, that frustrates me, but

I know it to be true.

Light.

My Inner Beast

Temporary danger to remind me that I’m alive. 

Heartbeat pumping in my throat, 

Waiting to be replaced with your loving. 

Longing for this moment with our names marked on it, 

Firmness in every touch to solidify this reality…

Hair pulling, ass grabbing, bite marking…

Exhales with fewer spaces in between to eventually create elongated sigh…

Been waiting to exhale 

Burning away the bullshit of life

Discovering life’s beauty 

With each lick that shivers your spine. 

Kisses, the only currency in our world. 

Needs and wants blurring together…

Heat of our bodies creating blurred lines, 

No time to feel empty 

When your desire is overflowing. 

Biting the inside of my lip to bite back my beast. 

Anything hard, it’s my mission to make soft. 

Anything wet, it’s my job to mop…

Probably causing more mess. 

Filth peaks my interest…

The feline in me believing my tongue  is cleaning. 

Your motives irrelevant 

As long as I believe my thirst is quenched. 

Never one to beg, 

Rarely pleased myself

Yet enjoying each second of the ride. 

The more you know me 

The less you’ll be aroused 

Silence about me is key 

To all of our chemistry. 

Learning Love

There are holes within me that no man nor woman can fill. 

Yet I damn near confuse the heat felt from your love as my completion…

When really what I feel with you is validation for me to repair what I’ve put off. 

Your love doesn’t heal me… it doesn’t possess that power to fix me. 

No matter how elevated we get in the clouds when we spend time together,

Your intent to save me will never equate to you being my Savior. 

I can cry a million tears in your arms,

But those tears will never transform into the living water that heals my soul. 

For we are both mortals, intentions pure, but weak with flesh. 

Even though you can never save me, 

you have that natural power to encourage me…

Encourage me to find the answers within myself to heal…

encourage me to continue to spread the love of God that flows through me… 

encourage me to get a step closer on my path of righteousness… 

encourage me to repair the patches of my soul,

so that I may receive fulfillment instead of emptiness from leaks. 

Really that’s what love is. 

Not to fix me. 

Not to heal me. 

Love is so powerful it encourages me to fix and heal myself. 

Speaking Your Love Language

That first kiss will let me know…

how deep I can go

where the boundary begins 

what to do next. 

Lower and lower my touches will go…

Warmer and warmer your body will go…

Closer and closer our vibes will approach…

Louder and louder our moans will grow…

Touches so precious…

Praying feelings don’t fill me 

Only satisfaction covering. 

Skeptical to approach your thoughts 

Rather your body speak 

Give your mind a vacation 

Allow your soul to be pleased through touch 

Right is this moment 

Wrong is any analysis 

Your touch on my neck 

Holding my breath to anticipate what’s next 

Love, the silent attendee 

Lowkey in the air 

Unlocking unknown destination 

Releasing irrelevancy 

Floating, whispering, 

Acknowledging, wimpering, 

Validating, submissing, 

Time finally captivating 

Seeking answers or 

Distracting my mental 

Either or is a satisfaction 

Simply enhancing existence 

Siren Call

Look, your time would be better spent with me. 

Forget work. 

Forget priorities. 

Forget obligations.  

Forget time, with me. 

I know what you need because I need it too. 

I know what you like because I like it too. 

So come on.  

You will be okay. 

Spend time with me. 

Show me what I see in your eyes. 

Do what is in your mind…with me. 

(If there were no negative consequences, would you join me without hesitation?) 

You would enjoy our time together, which may be your fear. 

Sometimes I think you hesitate because you know deep down that you would enjoy yourself in a whole new way if you let go of your inhibitions with me… and that is one of your biggest fears. That is what keeps you up at night. That is what makes you feel guilty even though you haven’t even done anything. The fact that you know this to be true is what keeps you questioning your every action around me. 

Well I don’t want to be your source of guilt or restriction…

I want to be your friend in fun.

I want to be your leader of peace…

your explorer of self…

your co-captiain in experiencing joy. 

Unrequited Love, Part 2

See are you ready for the honesty 

About this reality

That you might not see

That uncovers this “you and me”? 

We share the need to always inspire

Lifting each other’s moods satisfies our desire

Constantly stroking your ego 

In order to tame your inner hoe

The attention you get at home

Not enough to stop your eyes from the roam. 

But you’re not the only guilty party

My motives not 100% hearty 

I have a pattern of wanting what I can’t possess

The power of temptation, my biggest turn-on, I confess.

And maybe I enjoy the attention you provide 

To the little girl in me I try to hide

The limited care you bless me with

May be enough for me to prolong this myth

And maybe the main reason for my love for you

Has to do with the pain you own too.

At the end of the day I just want you to heal

I want to be the reason you start to feel…

Feel something besides the crushing weight of this life

But common sense reminds me that’s reserved for your wife

Your better has become my worse

Unrequited love seeming to be my curse. 

Unrequited Love, Part I

Attracted to the taken

With the vibe of forsaken

Sacrificing myself to be your vacation

From the day-to-day stagnation

Masquerading as your #1 fan

But really, do I give a damn?

Please don’t misunderstand what I’m saying

Just understand it’s a game we’re both playing

See we both get a thrill from the power trips

Each one ignited from the slickness out of our lips

Knowing you can turn me on with a look

Then every word I say gets you caught on my hook

The passion that blazes behind your eyes

The fuel to the fire between my thighs

The depth of your moans chilling my spine

The arch of my back got you ready to dine

Exchanging a laugh is our orgasm on PG

Whispering in my ear is the path to our ecstasy

I give, you take

Back and forth, no break

Losing our breath from a simple conversation

Challenging my thinking is your best form of penetration

You’re the release I never knew I needed 

I’m that siren in your head that’s now seeded 

You’re fun, you’re outstanding

I’m chill, never demanding

But keep in mind what this is

Two wounded souls handling our biz…